2 Degrees of Separation (Subtitle: Be careful what you resell.)

Kevin started it.  

Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon is a parlor game based on

the “six degrees of separation” concept which posits

that any two people on Earth are six or fewer acquaintance links apart.

Today, with connectivity being what it is, I think we’re down to two.

On my “get-better-at” list, I have the following:  Find or make images that help people grok the concepts I teach, like accountability, personal responsibility, listening “for the gold.” (A hat tip to Robert Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land for “grok“.)  This intention has put at least 6 books on my shelves, including Back of a Napkin, and has me drawing stick figures, star people and simple graphics.  In my next life, I’m coming back as a graphic facilitator – the person at the butcher paper wall who takes art and meaning-making to a new level of fun and grok-ability.

Parable  — a story that teaches a lesson or shares a principle.

(The names have not been changed.  We’re all adults. No innocents to protect.)

I received a tweet with an infographic I liked. The tweeter gave me the OK to republish the image and, at my request, connected me with a graphic facilitator, Dana Wright.  One tweet and one email later, Dana, a Scotts Valley resident, in-demand facilitator and author, and I had our coffee date scheduled.

I ordered her book, We’ve Got to Start Meeting Like This, from half.com (new-to-used copies, 50-85% cheaper than retail) and was delighted when it showed up in time for our meeting.  One glitch: the book was already dedicated to someone and signed by Dana.  What are the odds? Of the hundreds of books I could have order, I chose one that was already signed!

Dilemma! Do I show up with a used book, thus revealing my frugal nature or get a brand new one? Do I tear out the page with Dana’s signature, thus revealing my commitment to … what …CYA?

Given my preference for telling it like it is, I decided to take the book, as is, to our meeting.  At the very least, it would make for an interesting conversation.

Dana and I meet at the Abbey on Mission.  With proud-author pen in hand, Dana opened my copy, “Oh it’s already signed …”  I told her my story: half.com, dilemmas, decision.

Then, Dana says:  “What’s funny is that I know the person I signed this to. It was several months ago. I had asked her for an endorsement on Amazon which greatly affects new books’ standings.  Sunni asked me to send her a copy (which I found pretty bold, given she knows about book publishing and that, as a self-published author, my “free” copies come out of my pocket).  Not only did she not give me an endorsement, she never acknowledged that she got the book – and no Thank You!”

Bad girl

My “bad girl” and her sharp tongue pulled up a chair (she’s never far away).

I told Dana to cross out Sunni’s name, put mine in and send her a picture, saying “thinking of you.”

Dana riffed one better – check out my signed copy. (“To Camille, (who deserves it more than xxxx)”

Dana and I continued to our high-energy, well-caffeinated conversation, shared a mutual intention to work together and parted feeling very connected.  The End.

Lesson learned

What did you learn from this parable? Did it affirm your belief in karma? Did it drive home the point of consequences of actions?  Did this story remind you of a time when someone wronged you?  When you were the one doing the wronging?  Did it remind you of how we hold onto hurt feelings, often for years, because we didn’t give them a voice to release them when they were first hurt?

Usually, I offer a few actions you can take to apply what you learned and be a better leader, manager or individual contributor. This time, I’ll let you take whatever actions you choose. After all, we’re all adults here.